Happy Mother's Day

This day always feels me with several emotions. Here they are in no particular order.
1. I usually feel sad for myself and the fact that I'm not a mother and am no closer this year to becoming one than I was the year before or the year before or the year before that.
2. I am extremely happy and grateful for the wonderful, strong and humble mother I have been blessed with.
3. I feel sad for my mother because I feel she deserves so much more than the has been given. I guess I feel selfish for her a little.
4. I feel embarrassed that I am not a better child, I regret every negative thing I have done or said to her. I feel remorse for the time as a child I wrote I hate mom on the closet door frame, and for anytime I said it.
5. I feel grateful for all the other mothers that I claim as my own.
6. I feel grateful for the friends and family that I have that are also mothers and obviously great examples to me for when I do finally get the joy of being a mother.

I think as a tribute to mothers day I will list some well lets do 26 things about my mother since that's how long she has been mine.
1. She kept a journal when she was pregnant with me and for the first while of my life. She will not let me read it says I have to wait, but I'm pretty sure Selena has gotten hers. Maybe when I have kids.
2. She likes peanut butter on a piece of bread with a glass of milk for a snack at night.
3. She lost her mother when she was my age. It makes me sad cause I know I would not be able to be as strong as she was If it happened to me.
4. She had her last child at 36
5. She graduated from a Dallas school I always get the name wrong H.Grady spruce I think. She was 3rd in her class.
6. She LOVES the fact that she lives in Texas.
7. She wishes the South would have won. (not for slavery, other reasons)
8. When the song battle hymn of the republic is sung at church she sings Dixie.
9. My mom Loves the Lord and has much faith.
10. She is very creative and a great teacher (I think she should have been one)
11. She doesn't use or turn the computer on when it is raining. That drove me nuts when I lived at home, but now I'm the same way.
12. She graduated from TVCC after being a single mom to 3 kids and working full-time.
13. She hates yard work, I do too.
14. She LOVES to do genealogy and has met lots of relatives she didn't know she had.
15. She went to school with my dad they met in home economics I think but it wasn't till after high school that they went on a date.
16.When she buys new things and they have plastic on them she never takes it off. It has to wear its self off. We had a lamp that had plastic on it for about 5+ years. I think the lamp quit working and still had plastic on it
17. She bites her nails but nobody has ever seen her bite them, not even herself. I guess she does it in her sleep.
18. She has never done drugs.....that I know of.
19. She stole a spoon from the place they had prom and felt guilty about it and went back years later to return it and they were closed.
20. My mom is a pat rat. She keeps EVERYTHING.
21. She has a doll named Tammy she is like a barbie doll but much cooler. Selena and I ALWAYS wanted to play with Tammy but we were not allowed to but a few special occasions. However, Madalyn always got to play with her.
22. She lets us make our own choices. She just kinda hints at what the right ones are. If we make mistakes she lovingly tells us to use better judgement.
23. She grunts as she falls asleep.
24. Her favorite movie is North and South, that is where Madalyn's name came from.
25. Her house always, never runs out of toilet paper or trash bags. :)
26. She loves, unconditionally loves me, and is a great example to me everyday!

Happy Mother's Day, mom. I love you.